To Be Held
by sbfisher
Summary: The family is settling done in their new home, but new twists and a new case could easily tear them about. When everything falls, will they remember their promises to love and hold onto each other?
1. Chapter 1

AN: Begins shortly before the Khrustev list and picks up right after. Not a medical expert, so please don't hold this against me. I also don't have a beta, so any mistakes are solely mine.

I do not own SMK or any of its characters; however, this story belongs to me.

* * *

This is what it means to be held.  
How it feels when the sacred is torn from your life  
And you survive.  
This is what it is to be loved.  
And to know that the promise was  
When everything fell we'd be held.

- Natalie Grant, "Held"

Chapter One

_Friday afternoon, May 1987_

Jamie King stood on the driveway waiting for his older brother, Phillip, to come back out and to shoot some hoops with him. The thudding of the ball on the ground was rhythmic and allowed Jamie to spend a few minutes to reflect on how his afternoon had gone – badly. There was the fact that his dad had called, his science project was going no where, and he could feel his chest tightening up, rearing up for an asthma attack.

Hearing the sound of his mom's Jeep pulling into the driveway, Jamie looked up feeling a bit of relief until he realized that she wasn't in the Jeep after all. It was her boyfriend, Lee Stetson. Refraining from sighing, Jamie walked over to the tall man as he climbed out of the vehicle and reached into the back seat for a bag. "Hey, Lee. Where's mom?"

"Got held up at the office," he replied. Lee Stetson looked over at his stepson. "Actually, IFF is sending her to Williamsburg tonight to finish up that documentary we did last month on that all girl's school." Lee swung his overnight bag over his shoulder and started walking toward the house. "I know your father was supposed to come get you guys tonight, but…"

"I already know," Jamie interrupted. "Dad called awhile ago and told us he was bailing, again."

Lee turned to the young man and placed a hand on his shoulder. "Jamie –"

"It's ok, Lee, I understand." Jamie slammed the ball into the ground and caught it in the rebound. "So, if Mom is going to Williamsburg, Dad has bailed, and Grandma is visiting Aunt Lillian, then I am guessing you are staying with us tonight since you have your overnight bag." The ball slammed into the ground again.

Lee's eyes narrowed as he watched Jamie's face. "Yes, that's right. I hope that's ok with you and your brother." Jamie shrugged his shoulders, as if to say whatever. Lee sighed and sat his bag down on the ground. He had thought things were finally getting better between them. "Ok, something is bothering you. What's up?"

Jamie hesitated. He didn't want to bother Lee, but his Mom said he could trust this man. When she had that shooting accident in California, he thought he was going to lose her. But then Lee brought her home and had been helping around the house since then. He seemed to be genuinely interested in everything they did from the mundane to the very exciting even going as far as finding out that Jamie was interested in photography and had given him that really cool camera. He was still trying to adjust to the fact that Lee was not a temporary person in their lives. In fact, Jamie was willing to bet that Lee had designs on becoming a more permanent fixture in their lives. Jamie glanced up and saw that Lee was sincere in his inquiry. "The deal is that I've been asking Dad for his help on a science project that is due next week. I was planning on entering it into the Science Fair at the school. But the last few weeks he's called and bailed on us, and Mom is hopeless when it comes to rockets and rocket engineering…."

A smile crossed Lee's face as he listened to Amanda's youngest son. "Tell you what. After I go change clothes and order us some pizza, how about you tell me more about this project of yours. Maybe between the two of us, we can get it knocked out in no time. And, if there is something I'm not sure about, I have some friends at work who work in special effects who can probably help us." The look on Jamie's face was Lee's reward.

"Really? I mean, I would hate to bother you on something as stupid as a science project…" subconsciously Jamie started rubbing his hand across his chest.

"Hey," Lee interrupted, "anytime and anything for you, Jamie. I would hope you would know that by now," he finished and laid his arm across Jamie's shoulders. At that moment Phillip came out of the house and grabbed the ball from Jamie. "Hey, Lee! What's up?" Lee recounted for Phillip the plans for the evening and finished with, "Why don't you two finish your game and then come in? Pizza should be here by then, and then I'm going to sit down with Jamie and go over his plans for his science project."

Phillip nodded. "Cool. Listen, Jimmy and Carl were coming over to shoot hoops with us for awhile, in fact they should be here any minute. But that was before I knew you were coming over. Will that be ok until the pizza gets here?"

"Sure." Lee bent down and picked his bag back up. "I'll go order that pizza and get changed." Phillip bounced the ball once, nodded and headed over to the goal. Lee looked over at Jamie and gave him a once over. "Everything ok with you, Sport?"

"Yeah. Sure. Why?"

Lee pointed at Jamie and said, "Because I saw you rubbing your chest a few minutes ago. Your asthma ok?"

Jamie rolled his eyes. "Yeah, I'm fine. Just a bad afternoon. But now that you will be helping me on my project, I feel much better."

"You sure?"

Walking toward Phillip, he turned and commented, "Yes, I'm sure." At that moment Jimmy and Carl showed up and the boys began their two on two game. Lee watched them for a few minutes and then turned and entered the house. He glanced once more at Jamie, remembering the last time he had an asthma attack, one that had ended up at the emergency room. He would just have to keep a close eye on him until Amanda got home.

In the meanwhile, it was time to go order that pizza.

* * *

"So, Phillip," Carl started as he bounced the ball. Phillip was guarding him while Jamie guarded Jimmy. "What's up with your mom's boyfriend?"

"What do you mean?" Phillip replied.

Carl bounced the ball again looking for an opening to Jimmy. "I mean, he's here all the time. Is he like looking to get married to your mom or what?"

Phillip shrugged, not really paying attention to the conversation. "I guess. Can we play? We've only got a short time before supper gets here."

"So where is your mom, Jamie?" Jimmy asked.

"Out of town," Jamie answered. "Why? Not that it's any of your business…"

Jimmy smirked at Jamie. "You really don't get it, do you? You mom is just trying to find someone to replace your dad. Happens all the time. Happened with my mom. Guy leaves the picture, girl tries to find someone to replace the guy. Although, I understand it's hard for moms to replace guys when there are kids involved. Again, that happened with my mom."

Jamie shook his head. "You've got it all wrong about Lee. He really cares about our mom and us, too. He's not going to dump mom just because of us."

"Yeah, right. You are so naïve."

"Better take it back, Jimmy." The others had stopped the game and watched as Jimmy and Jamie came toe to toe.

"Make me."

Jamie pushed at Jimmy and before they knew it, the boys were on the ground pushing and hitting each other. Phillip knew he was in over his head and ran to get Lee.

* * *

"Yeah, two large pizzas, one pepperoni, and the other cheese. Yes, ok, thanks. See you soon." Lee hung up the phone and was pulling out the money when Phillip barged in through the back door. "Hey, Chief, just because your mom isn't here…"

"Lee, come quick! Jamie and Jimmy are fighting!" Lee dashed out the door with Phillip on his heels. He grabbed both of the boys by the back of their shirts and pulled them off of each other. "Ok, that's enough! What's going on?" At that moment, Lee took a closer look at Jamie and noticed that the youth had trouble gasping for breath. "Jamie," Lee let go of Jimmy. "Jamie, can you breathe?" Shaking his head, Jamie couldn't reply. "Do you have your inhaler?" Another negative shake. "Phillip, run inside and get his inhaler!"

Lee pulled the wheezing boy over to the picnic table and sat him down. Sitting down beside him, he began, "Ok, Jamie, just like last time, just try to calm down, listen to my voice, try to breathe with me…." Phillip approached Lee and handed him the inhaler. Giving it to Jamie, he watched as Jamie took a couple of puffs and slowly started to breathe better. Lee looked up at the other two boys still standing there. "Jimmy, I don't know what started the fight, I really don't care, but I think it's time for the two of you to go on home." The boys nodded and left, looking over their shoulders as they walked down the driveway.

Lee looked over at Jamie and saw him close his eyes and lean back on Lee's arm. He was still wheezing a little. Lee nudged him and Jamie opened his eyes. "Ok, Sport, let's try for a couple more…." Jamie obediently took the couple of puffs and seemed to improve even more.

"Ok?" Lee asked him. Jamie nodded, but was suddenly too tired to move. Lee, from personal experience, knew that the boy would be tired for a few minutes. "How about we move this inside and wait for the pizza?" Jamie nodded once more. Without a second thought, Lee stooped down and gathered up the boy and carried him to the couch in the family room.

* * *

The pizza had arrived, and the three ate quickly. Lee knew that Jamie was embarrassed by what had happened earlier that evening. After cleaning up and putting up the few remaining pieces of the pizza, Lee looked at Phillip and tipped his head toward the stairs. Taking the hint, Phillip went up the stairs and left Lee and Jamie alone.

They remained silent for a few moments before Jamie spoke. "So, what are you going to tell Mom?"

Lee absently "scratched" at the table before glancing over at Jamie's small form. Bringing his hand up to his face, he asked, "What do you want me to tell her?"

"Mom says we should always stick with the truth. We'll get into less trouble that way." Lee covered his mouth before Jamie could see him. If he only knew… "Jamie, like I told your friends, I really don't care what started the fight. What I am concerned about is the asthma attack. You haven't had one in over a month. Want to tell me what is really going on with you? And not just what happened today."

Jamie shrugged. "What does it matter?"

"It matters because I care about you." Lee leaned forward and placed his elbows on his knees. "I care about you and I worry if there something going on that I don't know or understand. Why don't you enlighten me? Maybe I can help?"

Jamie returned Lee's scrutiny with one of his own. Again, he saw the sincerity in the older man's face and eyes. Did he really care what went on in their everyday lives? With that thought, Jamie began talking to Lee about his fears and frustrations regarding how Joe was never around, his insecurity regarding how Lee fit into his life, and that he was still worried about his mother even though the shooting accident was over three months ago.

At some point during the conversation, he and Lee moved to the couch and eventually Lee had his arm around the young man and just listened to him pour out his heart. The walls that had been erected between them were finally being torn down. Eventually, Jamie's eyes grew sleepy and before he or Lee knew it, he was out.

Lee looked down at this young man he had secretly watched grow up over the last four years. He and his brother have certainly changed during that time! Lee gently caressed the boy's hair – his son's hair – and silently thanked God that Amanda had allowed him into her and the boys' lives.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

_Later that evening_

Lee sighed and closed the case file with some frustration. The investigation into the all girl school in Williamsburg was quickly heading into a dead end. Shortly after Lee got the boys up to their rooms and beds, Amanda had called to check on him and to update him on what she and Francine had found, which wasn't much. They decided they would spend the night in Williamsburg and try again the next day. They had a couple of ideas they wanted to checkout and after bouncing them off Lee, decided to proceed.

When Lee had told her about Jamie, she had also expressed concern but was pleased that Lee was able to handle the situation on his own. He promised her he would continue to keep an eye on Jamie and to let know if anything else happened.

Leaning back against the couch, Lee's thoughts drifted to the conversation with Jamie….

"_Tell me what you're afraid of, Jamie."_

_Jamie shrugged his shoulders then, without looking at Lee, replied, "You, not staying, not wanting to be involved in our stuff, having to be tied down to a readymade family."_

_Sighing Lee draped an arm across the boy's shoulders. "Jamie, I want nothing more than to be here with you, Phillip, and your mother. She made it clear to me a long time ago that you all were a package deal." He tightened his grip on Jamie before continuing, "and I wouldn't trade these moments with you guys for anything."_

"_Really?" Jamie blinked his eyes, which opened again to a wide eyed look. "You're not just saying that to make me feel better, are you?" He looked down at this into his hands resting on his lap._

_Lee placed his finger under Jamie's chin and raised it so that the boy could see him clearly. "I really mean it. My favorite days are when we go play ball, or go to the movies, or just hang out here at your house." Dropping his hand, he asked, "Did your mom tell you about my parents?"_

_Jamie shook his head no. "She always said that was your story to tell, not hers."_

_Lee settled back into the couch, pulling Jamie with him. "My parents were killed when I was five years old in a car accident. The only living relative I had was my father's half brother, Robert Clayton, who was career military and had no desire to raise children. So, when I was handed off to him after the funeral, I had to learn how to depend on just one person – me. It wasn't until your mom came along that I learned it was okay to depend on others, to get to really know people. Sure, I hung out with others from work, but I choose not to learn anything about them." He turned to face Jamie. "And all your mom would do each time we got together was talk about what you and your brother were up to – what games were coming up, the plays, school projects. And I found myself wanting to know more, so I would ask questions and soon I learned what your favorite sports were, who was Phillip's love interest of the week, what interests you had. And I found myself wanting to spend time with you boys. So, after you mom and I started dating, I asked if we could spend some together, all of us, you boys included. I wanted to work with this package deal. I already knew what a great mom you have. I just wanted find out if her sons were just as special."_

"_What did you decide?"Jamie asked softly._

_Lee pulled Jamie into a tight embrace. "That her boys were indeed very special."_

Shaking his head, he took the file and replaced it in his briefcase, then walked throughout the house, turning off lights and making sure windows and doors were secured before taking the stairs up to Amanda's room. He grinned to himself recalling the conversation with the boys earlier that evening regarding the sleeping arrangements. He had offered to sleep on the couch in difference of the boys, but even they said it was stupid to do that when their mom's bed was readily available and no one else was there.

Before going on into her room, Lee turned and went to check on the boys. Peeking in, he could see Phillip's back rising with each steady breath. Glancing over in Jamie's direction, he couldn't help but notice that the younger boy seemed to be wheezing slightly in his sleep. He stood beside Jamie's bed, then gently brushed the hair from his forehead. Jamie turned his head toward Lee, but remained asleep. Assuring himself all was well, he headed off to bed.

**

"Lee? Lee, come on, wake up."

Feeling his body being shaken, Lee opened his eyes to see Phillip standing beside the bed. "Hm? Phillip? What's wrong? It's 2 o'clock in the morning."

"It's Jamie," Phillip explained. At that Lee threw the covers off his body. "He's been wheezing for awhile, but now it sounds like he's really struggling to breath."

Lee raced to the boys' room with Phillip right behind him. Flipping on the lights, Lee could immediately see and hear what Phillips was telling him.

Jamie was in a full blown asthma attack.

Grabbing the boy up, Lee barked at Phillip to quickly put his shoes on, before heading back to Amanda's room to grab his shoes and shirt. He further instructed Phillip to grab his keys and to meet them at the Jeep.

Phillip ran out the door and quickly unlocked the Jeep. Crawling into the back seat, he scooted over and helped Lee place his brother in with him, cradling him to his chest to help ease his breathing. Within seconds they were on the road to Arlington Memorial.

**

"Someone! Help us!" Lee rushed in the emergency doors carrying Jamie. A doctor and nurse rushed to meet them. "He's having an asthma attack."

The doctor quickly took Jamie from Lee and rushed him into one of the trauma rooms. Lee and Phillip made to follow them, but were stopped by another nurse. "Sir, I'm sorry you're going to have to wait here. I have some forms that need to be filled out. Please, follow me. He's really in good hands. You'll just be in the way." Lee shoved his hands through his hair in frustration. He had been through this before, but last time, Amanda had been with him. He was here, alone. Correction, he thought. He was there with Phillip as well. Phillip who looked very scared for his brother. Lee needed to be strong for Phillip and not freak out.

He nodded and began to follow the nurse to the admitting desk. He draped his arm around Phillips's shoulders and gave them a firm squeeze. "He's going to be ok," he whispered.

"Yeah, he will." Phillip leaned further into Lee's shoulder as if trying to draw some strength from him.

"Now, before we begin we have to ask what is your relationship to the boy. Is he your son?" the nurse asked.

Lee nodded. "My stepson."

The nurse pulled a clipboard out and handed it to Lee. "If you could fill this out for me."

Lee took the forms, then looked back up at the nurse. "Uhm, he's been here before, last month, same thing. Can't you just pull his file?"

"We can, but we also need to have the admitting parent fill this out. It's just so we can protect the minor. You understand."

Lee nodded. "Sure. I'll get these back to you in a few minutes." The nurse gave him an encouraging smile before turning to help another patient. Lee turned and directed Phillip over to a set of waiting room chairs. "Might as well make ourselves comfortable, or as comfortable as these chairs can be."

Philip sat down beside Lee and watched as the older man began to fill out the forms. "Lee, don't you think we need to call mom? Or Grandma?"

Lee nodded, continuing to fill out what he could. "We will, as soon as we know how your brother is doing."

"But, Lee," Phillip continued. "That nurse said admitting parent…"

"Yes, or just as this form says, guardian," Lee answered pointing back to the form.

Phillip scrunched up his face in confusion. "But, and I'm not trying to say that you aren't important to our family because you are, but you're mom's boyfriend. And you told that nurse you were our step father. I don't understand."

The agent sighed, and leaned back in his chair, closing his eyes. In the moment of worrying about Jamie and how he could best help him, he had let that one truth slip. How he wished Amanda as there at that very moment. Phillip may not apply himself well in school, but he was every bit as intelligent as his mother. He's going to make a decent lawyer someday…..

"Phillip," he began and turned to the young man. "What I'm about to tell you goes no further until we get a chance to talk to your mother. Understand?"

Phillip nodded his head, but still looked very confused.

"Through a series of events, I fell in love with your mother, asked her to marry me and so we did. What those circumstances were, I can't tell you yet, not until I get a chance to talk to her. But in answer to your original question, I am your and your brother's step father." Phillip looked away and Lee was beginning to feel like he had lost all hope of retaining any trust he had built up with the King boys.

"Wow, my step father. That means the corvette is now part of the family, right?"

Lee looked incredulously at the young man, and then began to laugh. After a moment, Phillip joined him. Lee looped an arm around him, and then pressed his face into his step son's hair. Sighing, he picked up the pen and once again began to tackle the admitting paperwork for his younger son.

**

_Saturday Morning_

Lee had dozed off and on in the chair by the hospital bed since they had admitted Jamie as a precaution. The doctor felt certain they could release Jamie to go home by early afternoon, but wanted to make sure that whatever had triggered the asthma attacks had finally settled down.

He had dreaded making the phone call so early in the morning, but once he had her on the phone, the first thing he told her was,_ "He's going to be ok." _

"_What happened?"_

_Lee had shoved his hand through his hair. "I checked on him before I went to bed. I thought he was wheezing a little, but not enough to turn into an asthma attack. Phillip came and woke me at 2am, then I rushed Jamie to the emergency room. The doctor says he's going to be okay, they're just admitting him as a precaution. They think he could be released later this afternoon." He closed his eyes. "I'm sorry I let you down, Amanda."_

"_Lee," Amanda sighed. "You didn't let me down; I'm proud of you! You just faced your first crisis as a parent by yourself. I'm just glad you were there for the boys."_

_Lee smiled at her praise, but it quickly vanished as he remembered his 'slipup'. "Amanda, when they were admitting Jamie, they asked if I was the parent and I sort of let it slip that I was. Phillip was standing right there. I had to tell him we did get married. I know it's not how you had envisioned our telling your family…"_

"_Its okay, Lee. What's done is done. Does Jamie know?"_

"_Not yet. He's still asleep."_

"_I'll be home soon. We'll tell him together."_

That had been a few hours ago. Upon hearing of the family emergency, Billy Melrose had sent up another female agent to relieve Amanda so Lee knew she would be home soon. After glancing once more at the two boys, the one in the bed and the other on the couch by the window, both sound asleep, he tipped his head back once more and closed his eyes.

It could have been just a few minutes or an hour later, when he felt a familiar presence next to him. Her perfume wafted over him, her soft hand brushed through his hair then down his cheek. He opened his eyes to see the woman he loved standing next to him. "Hi."

"Hi," her husky voice replied. She kissed him softly then turned her attention to her younger son. "How's he doing?"

Lee nodded his head. "Better. The nurse was in not too long ago. They're going to slowly wean off the medicine and see how he handles it. The doctor said since this was the second serious asthma attack in a month, they want to send something home called a nebulizer – it's a breathing machine that he will need to use daily for awhile. It's not to replace his inhaler, but they think with all the pollen in the air and end of school stress, that it's causing the triggers." He grabbed her hand, seeing her expression, knowing what she was thinking. "Amanda, if you're worried about it not being covered by insurance, don't. Jamie is part of my responsibilities now, and it's time I helped, for the good and the bad." She smiled back at him and squeezed his hand. Lee let her go and she went to sit on the side of the boy's bed, running her hands through his hair.

Jamie opened his eyes and saw his mother sitting there. "Mom?"

"Hey, sweetheart. How are you feeling?"

Jamie closed his eyes for moment. "Better. Lee took care of us really good, didn't he, Phillip?"

The adults turned to see the oldest King boy sit up and rub his eyes. "He sure did. Hey, Mom," he greeted his mother.

Amanda smiled. "Hey yourself."

Jamie tugged at her hand. "Mom, when can we go home?"

"Soon, sweetheart. We're waiting on the doctor to tell us we can take you home." She smiled and rubbed Jamie's hair. Jamie gave her a long suffering look when she did that as if saying 'I'm not a little kid anymore'.

"Well, in that case," Phillip began as he made his way over to Jamie's side. "Jamie and I have a few questions to ask our parents," he commented looking at both Amanda and Lee. "And we suggest that you start with how you guys met and end with how you ended up getting married without telling anyone."

Jamie looked over at Lee. "Phillip and I talked earlier when you were asleep." The look of confusion on Lee's face was then replaced by a sheepish look.

"Ok," Amanda started, as she turned and made herself comfortable on the bed next to Jamie. "How about we begin this little story with how we met." Her eyes twinkled as they settled on the man she had been in love with for so many years. "It began at a train station, four years ago, and a man walked up to me and asked me to give a package to a man with a red hat…."


	3. Chapter 3

AN: Sorry I left everyone hanging - RL interferred way too much the last few months. I do have plans for other chapters. Hopefully I'll be able to add a little more quickly. Enjoy!

Chapter 3

_Sunday evening_

Amanda finished the last of the dishes, made a final swipe of the counter, and then finally hung up her towel. Putting her hands in her pockets, she glanced over at the two heads bent over the breakfast table, deep in discussion. A smile pulled at her lips as she watched them. Who would have thought that these two, who were at odds with each other just a few months ago, would be working this close on a project?

Glancing once at the clock on the wall, Amanda walked up to the table and slipped her hands down onto Lee's shoulders. "Hey, big fella. You two might want to wrap this up. It's getting late and we do have to work and go to school tomorrow." Groans erupted from the table and the family room. "Sorry, fellas, two more weeks and school will be over. Let's just get through it so we can enjoy our summer."

Lee and Jamie made quick work of cleaning and putting up the science project materials. It wasn't long before the boys were ready for bed and headed off in that direction.

Pulling his wife down onto the couch with him, he put his arms around her and sighed. Amanda glanced up at him. "What's wrong, sweetheart?"

"Nothing really," Lee replied. "It's just, I got a chance to play dad to two wonderful boys this weekend. It was a wonderful feeling, you know? And then telling them about what we really do, our jobs, and I'm finding myself slightly overwhelmed. I can't help but wonder if the boys aren't feeling it as well and just not telling us?"

Amanda chuckled into his shirt. "The boys have always been able to handle change so much better than me. They were so excited to find out we were spies…."

"Intelligence operative," Lee mumbled.

"…and then they had to go and say stuff like 'hey, weren't you the guy that saved us and our dad that one time in the school gym? That was so awesome!'" She started chuckling again.

Lee shook his head. "Some spies we are. Can't fool a 12 and 14 year old."

They sat for awhile in each others arms, enjoying the quiet of the evening. Before long, Lee shifted and made to look as if he were leaving. "Where are you going?"

He sighed and turned to her. "I don't want this weekend to be over, but you were right – tomorrow we return to the land of Lee Stetson and Amanda King, intelligence operatives, out to save the world. The boys go to school like nothing happened, and I go back to my apartment, alone."

Amanda raised her hand to his cheek. "You don't have to go – you can stay here. Begin a new chapter with us."

"We're not moving too fast are we?"

She shook her dark hair and smiled. "I don't think we're moving fast enough." And then she leaned up and captured his lips, and his heart, once more. Letting him know that he was no longer alone in the world.

_

* * *

_

_Several weeks later…._

Lee and Amanda stood in the middle of the home, watching as movers carefully moved furniture and boxes into their new home. After much discussion with the family, they all decided a new home for their new family was a good way to start off their new lives. The house was still in the boys' school district so they would not have to switch schools. Each boy was also allowed a room to call their own, while Dottie was being settled into her own suite of rooms. She had protested at first claiming that Amanda and her family needed time to settle in without a nosy mother in law, but Lee was quick to point out there would be times they would be called out of town for assignments and needed someone to stay with the boys. In addition, her suite allowed her own private area to entertain friends if she so wanted.

Lee and Jamie had finished his science project on time and still managed to pull out a second place. They had vowed to start much earlier for the next time, with Lee right by his side helping with each step. Jamie's asthma problems also seemed to be settling down.

Lee and Phillip were also working on their own bonding by working on the cars or shooting hoops while Phillip talked to Lee about his girl problems.

Amanda sighed as these thoughts went through her head. Lee, hearing her, as by side with a questioning look on his face. A small smile graced her face and then cupped his face with her small hands. "It's nothing, but at the same time, it's everything. We're finally getting to live like a family. The boys adore you, I think my mother is in love with you, and we have our dream home. I can't help but think it's the calm before the storm."

Lee pulled her closer to him and wrapped his arms around her. Leaning his forehead against her, he too sighed. "And you are usually right on these feelings. So, what do we do in the meanwhile?"

"We go on, as before, and then if it does happen we'll be ready. We'll need to prepare the boys and mother, for just in case." Amanda pulled back. "And we need to remind each other every day how much we love each other." And then she proceeded to show him.

It wouldn't be too long before she was proved


	4. Chapter 4

AN: This chapter and the next will be setting the stage. The chapters are slightly longer than what I've done in the past, but I want to be sure that everything is covered. Enjoy! SBF

* * *

Chapter 4

Silence surrounded her as it had all her life. She held her breath, knowing, even though she couldn't hear it, that she was breathing a little too fast. Pressing her hand to the floor, she felt for the vibrations of the footsteps that had paced heavy and quick past her hiding spot. Fear kept her eyes open, just as her mother had drilled into her - fear that if she closed them then _they_ would find her.

She didn't dare to breathe or move. She stayed in that position for what seemed like hours. It had been dark when her mother had come for her, shoving her into the hiding spot, and told her not to move until she came back. But as daylight began to filter across the floor, she realized that she was indeed not coming back.

Creeping out from her hiding place that was the crawlspace of the closet, she slipped from the room and cautiously looked in each room as she made her way toward the living area. There, she found her. Her mother's eyes were open, but unseeing. The dark pool under her body spoke of how she had died, but not why.

Covering her face with her hands, Jennifer slid to the floor and cried her silent tears. She was still in that same position when the police finally arrived.

* * *

It was the end of June, and it was already proving to be a hot summer. With the Fourth of July coming up, the new couple had asked for time off to be with their family for a real vacation. They had decided to not go anywhere specific, just stay at home and to settle into their new home and lives. Lives that were about to be abruptly turned upside down.

A dark brown sedan slowly made its way down the street and turn up the long driveway toward the modest home in Arlington. Billy Melrose turned off the engine to the car, and sat for a few minutes collecting his thoughts. There were certain aspects of his job that he hated, and this was one of them.

Walking up the long sidewalk to the house, he noted that while the house sat back a ways from the road, it did not isolate them from the rest of the neighborhood. _That would have killed Amanda,_ he thought. Knocking on the door, Billy suppressed the smile that was slowly creeping up on his face. He heard Amanda's two boys hollering to whoever was closest to answer the door. Before long a young man with light brown hair, braces, and glasses answered the door. A quizzical look appeared on his young face. "Can I help you?"

"Yes, you may. Is your mom or step father around? I'm Mr. Melrose, their supervisor," Billy replied.

Jamie blinked and then held the door open further. "Oh, sure. They're out back. I'll get them." He then turned and headed off for the patio. Billy stepped in further to the home and then gently shut the door behind him. He took a moment to look over the home the agents had bought just a few weeks earlier. While it still had the moving in look it was definitely a blended touch of his and hers, although Billy felt that Amanda definitely had a say so as to what was allowed in her home….

At that moment Lee and Amanda Stetson walked into the house and crossed the room to where Billy stood. "Billy?" Lee asked, reaching out and clasping his boss's hand in form of a greeting. "What brings you by?"

"Lee," he began softly. "Is there somewhere we can talk, privately?"

Lee nodded. "Uhm, sure. The study is over here. It's the one place in the house Amanda and I have told everyone is off limits."

Leading the way into the study, Lee opened the door and ushered his boss and his wife into the room then closed the door. "Ok, what's up? You know, we're on vacation and not due back into the office until next week…"

Billy shoved his hands into his pockets. Sighing, he looked the young agent in the face. "There is no easy way to tell you except to just jump in. Do you remember Samantha Wilson?"

Lee again nodded. "Sure, I knew her, but that was a long time ago. What does this have to do with me? The last time I talked to Sam, it was over eleven years ago when she accepted that transfer to the Philadelphia office. I haven't seen or spoken to her since then."

"Sam's dead, Lee. As of last night."

"Dead? How, why?"

Billy shook his head. "We're not sure yet. We don't even know what cases she was involved in. Initially, local police was covering the case, but as soon as they realized she was one of ours, they turned it over. She was attacked for some reason and, from the looks of it, she was tortured in the end. But that's not all." The smaller man paused, as if gathering up his resolve before breaking the rest of the news. "Lee, she was survived by a child, a daughter. She's eleven."

Lee quickly turned away and looked out the window, not really seeing the activities ongoing. He remembered the red headed agent, who was also hurting all those years ago as he was. Losing a partner was never easy, something they both understood, how they had turned to each other, and how they had helped each other heal….

"Is she mine?"

Billy glanced over at Amanda, waiting for her cue. Amanda, sensing the tension in her husband, crossed the room and gently laid a hand on his shoulder. "Yes, according to her birth certificate."

Lee shoulders slumped down, closed his eyes, and then raised them to meet his wife's. "She never told me." Amanda nodded, giving her silent support. Lee turned again toward his supervisor. "Where is she?"

"Social Services has her right now. Because the home is now listed as a crime scene…."

"Whoa," Lee interrupted. "She was there?"

Billy held up his hand. "She didn't see anything. Apparently, as soon as Sam realized what was going on, she hid Jennifer and then confronted the intruders."

"Was she able to tell the police anything she might have heard?" Amanda queried.

Billy sighed, then shook his head. "There's something else you need to know about Jennifer."

* * *

"She's deaf." The social worker informed the couple in front of her. "But she can speak and she can read lips. Her mother apparently wanted her to be able to communicate with not only the deaf community but be able to function in the hearing world as well." Ms. Gleason bent over her file again to make sure she had covered everything. "The file mentions that you are the biological father, is that correct?"

Lee nodded. "That's what they tell me." He was beginning to feel the surrealness of it all. He could usually think fast when he was in the field, being shot at, interrogating suspects, but this? He had just gotten used to Amanda's sons – what was he going to do with a daughter he knew nothing about?

Amanda squeezed his hand, then turned back to the social worker. "Ms. Gleason, when can we take Jennifer home with us? I know that she has already had one traumatic experience today, and shuffling her off to a foster home until we get the paperwork settled doesn't seem to be in the best interest of the child."

"I'm glad you and I are thinking the same thing, Mrs. Stetson. I feel I should tell you that Jennifer may have some rough days, if not nights, ahead for her. Not only did she loose her mother in such a tragic manner, she was also the person to find her this morning." Ms. Gleason closed the file and clasped her hands on top. "It won't be easy on any of you, not only dealing with a traumatic event such as this but also her handicap. Because of this, we will release Jennifer into your custody but we will also make home visits for the next several weeks, just to make sure everyone is settling in okay." She pulled some paperwork out and began to fill in the blanks. "I'll need you and your husband to sign these custody forms and then we'll get her checked out. I will also like to refer you all to a family therapist…."

Lee finally pulled himself out of his stupor. "Therapist? Why?"

Ms. Gleason sighed and replied, "Because of the facts I just stated, Mr. Stetson. And to see how you, your wife, your daughter, and your wife's sons, adjust to this change. We want what will be best for Jennifer in the long run." She sat back in her seat. "And, we want to make sure that Jennifer doesn't suffer from post traumatic stress syndrome from all these changes."

Feeling his wife squeeze his arm, he looked first into her confidant eyes, then back to the social worker. "So, tell us about this therapist."

Ms. Gleason smiled and slid the business card across the desk.

**TBC.....**


	5. Chapter 5

**AN: I finally got a chapter updated! Between work and a hand injury it's been difficult to get this done. Please note any sign language will be in bold.**

* * *

Chapter 5

The large man behind the desk steepled his fingers, drumming them together, his insidious eyes drilled into the two men standing before him causing them to shift uncomfortably under his gaze. It was several minutes before he found his voice. "What part of my instructions did you not understand?"

The smaller of the two men, Jameson, spoke, "You see…"

"No," he interrupted. "My instructions were specific. The woman was to remain alive. You were to interrogate her, maybe even use persuasive measures, to get her to talk. Now that she is dead, our chances in finding the list maybe lost."

Jameson tried again. "Boss, we tried, we really did. We had searched her, but she pulled this knife from nowhere – "

The slamming of his hands on the desk reverberated in the room. Standing, he spoke in a low, menacing voice, "You fools, she was a spy. Of course she would have defended herself." He walked away from his desk to view the world outside his 10th floor office. "Please tell me you were able to get something useful from her before she died."

The other man, Kline, who had been silent up to now, spoke up. "No really, boss. However, we did learn something this afternoon."

He turned from the window. "Well, don't keep it to yourself. What was it?"

"We discovered she is survived by a daughter."

Geoff Abrams stepped closer to his henchman. "Was she there?"

"Apparently she was. But we never saw her. That's not what makes her special." He paused to give the news more of an impact. "Her father is Lee Stetson."

Abrams growled. "Scarecrow." He turned back to the window. "Find him."

* * *

The car ride back to Arlington was very quiet. Amanda turned in her seat a few times to make sure the young girl could see her, but Jennifer apparently was not ready to talk to anyone. After several tries, Amanda finally admitted defeat and turned back to look at her husband.

Ever since they had received the news, Lee had been very quiet. Amanda rested her hand on his arm to lend her silent support and then began to voice her thoughts out load. "I think tomorrow, if Jennifer is up to it, Mother and I will take her shopping for some new things to go in her room like bedding, posters, that kind of thing. What do you think?"

"Hmm?"

Amanda sighed. "Lee, we need to let Jennifer know that she is welcome in our home. Some of that will include fixing up a room for her. What do you think?"

Lee straightened up in his seat and shot his a wife a relieved look. "Oh, sure. I think that's great. Just let me know what you need me to do."

Glancing back to see if Jennifer was still playing oblivious, Amanda turned back to her husband once more. "Lee, you didn't seriously think you were going to have to worry about Jennifer's well being by yourself, did you?" His silence and the guilty look was all she needed for an answer. "Lee Stetson, you should know better by now. We are all a part of this family now: you, me, the boys, mother and now Jennifer. We will all need to work together and that means solving problems together. None of this lone wolf stuff anymore, you hear me? I thought you gave that up a long time ago."

Lee had the good graces to look sheepish. "I know, I know. I just wasn't thinking, you know? Sam never once told me about her. If I had…."

"You weren't ready for a family, Lee. Not then, and I think Sam knew that. I didn't know her, but I feel that was what caused her to not to let you know. At least she put your name on the birth certificate, and she left instructions in case something like this happened." She paused, and then continued, "You have definitely changed, Scarecrow, in more ways than one since I met you. And I can say that you are now ready for that family – look how you and the boys have bridged your relationship in just a few months? You know Jamie, he doesn't trust easily and he trusts you." Glancing once more at the sad young girl in the back seat, she finished, "And, given enough time, she will too."

He sighed. "I hope so."

* * *

Jennifer carefully placed her bags on the bed and then turned when she felt the touch at her arm. Looking up to see her new step mother standing there, she waited to see what Amanda had to say. "Jennifer, this will be your room. Tomorrow, if you feel up to it, we'll go shopping for some bedding and other stuff to brighten up your room. What do you think?"

Jennifer shrugged her shoulders. "Ok, I guess."

"Ok." Amanda looked around the room to make sure nothing else was needed to be moved out, and then returned her gaze to the young girl. "Supper will be at 6. This is your home now, so feel free to look around. The only room that is off limits to everyone is the study. It was the room I pointed - " Amanda turned her head and pointed back the way they had come, so Jennifer missed what was said. "Ok? Any questions?"

"I'm sorry, I missed that last part. What room?" Jennifer questioned.

Amanda blushed. "No, I'm sorry. I just have to remember to not turn around when talking to you. It's the room just to the left of the stairs when we came in the door. That's the one room that is off limits to everyone, including my mother. Has to do with our job – classified information." Amanda smiled. "Think you can give me a small learning curve on this communication stuff."

Jennifer found herself smiling back. "Sure."

"Great. Well, I'll leave you to unpack, but don't hesitate to let any of us know if you need anything, ok?" Amanda squeezed her shoulder gently. It was enough to almost bring tears to Jennifer's eyes. She swallowed them quickly and nodded, not trusting herself to talk.

"I will."

With a final nod, Amanda stepped out of the room leaving Jennifer alone for the first time since that morning when…..

Shaking her head of those thoughts, Jennifer swiped at those few tears that had escaped and turned to the first task of making the room hers. She quickly unpacked her stuff and once she was satisfied that her few belongings were in place, decided to explore the house.

Stepping out of her room, she noticed another bedroom across the hall from hers and saw the door was hanging open. Stepping up, she saw a boy with glasses sitting at his desk looking as some pictures. Knocking softly on the door to announce her presence, she waited until the boy raised his head and waved her in. "Hey."

"Hi." She tilted her head toward his pictures. "Nice. Who took them?"

Remembering what his mom said, he made sure he was facing her before he said with a bit of pride, "I did. I was messing with the camera your dad gave me, trying a few different shots. What do you think?"

"I think they look great." She paused, and then spoke up again. "Jamie, what can you tell me about my dad? My mom never really told me about him, and now that I'm here…"

"You want to know what you got up against you." Jamie nodded. "I understand, trust me. My mom and dad separated before I was even in kindergarten and then were divorced not long after. Mom had several different boyfriends over the years, but because she had us, and some of them didn't really want kids, they didn't always stick around. At least, not until Lee came into our lives. He's really great. If you have a problem, he'd sit down and listen to you, and I mean really listen, and help you come up with a solution. And he's great at mediating things when Phillip and I get into it. He also sets down some really tough rules, but they're there for our safety so we can't really complain. Give him time, he'll grow on you."

Jennifer sat for a few minutes thinking this over until she saw a hand wave in her eyesight. "I have a question for you, if it's ok," Jamie asked.

Shrugging her shoulders, she replied. "Ok, I guess."

"Would you be willing to teach me sign language?"

Eyes twinkling, a smile blossomed on her face. "**I will be happy to,**" She replied and signed. "Let's start with the basics…"

* * *

Bed time came quickly and children were herded off to their respective beds. After one last look on children, and one last patrol of the windows and doors, Lee crawled into bed next to his wife. "Well, what a stormy start to our lives as Mr. and Mrs. Stetson."

Upon seeing the quizzical look on his wife's face, he began to recount. "Let's start off with having a secret engagement, a secret wedding – that we almost missed, a honeymoon that ended disastrously, having everyone find out about said secret marriage, and now we not only have two sons, but a daughter I didn't even realize I had."

After he finished his narrative, Amanda closed her book and set it aside. "Lee, I knew about your other relationships – the ones you had long before I was even in the picture. I guess, somewhere deep down, I always knew there was this possibility." She caressed his arm. "And I'm sorry you had to find out this way."

"I know," he replied, picking at the sheets. "I guess I was just having a pity party of one. Forgive me?" He flashed his grin at her.

Amanda groaned. "You smile at me like that and I have no choice but to forgive you!" She settled down against his body and draped her arm across his chest, resting her head on his shoulder.

Several minutes passed before he spoke again. "Amanda?"

"Hm?" she replied sleepily.

"I'm thinking of asking Billy to let me be on the case."

That woke her.

"What? Lee, there is no way Billy will approve you to take the case, especially if your daughter is involved," she argued.

Lee sat up. "But I have to try, Amanda. I knew Sam, or thought I did. Maybe I'll pick up on something that others would miss. I'd be kicking myself if I didn't at least try."

She sighed and shook her head, the dark strands swirling around her face. "I should be talking you out of it, but if it were one of the boys…."

"You would be doing it, too."

"Then I'll support you as best as I can." She huffed and laid back down. "Guess vacation is over, huh?"

"Only for me. You have a new daughter to help settle in. I'll make it back by supper each night, ok?" Lee leaned over her body, waiting for her answer.

She held her answer, looking up at his face, seeing the intensity there. He needed to know the answers, if not for him then for Jennifer. Brushing a hand over his face, she traced her thumb over his lips, and replied, "Ok," before his lips descended on hers, showing her once more how much he loved her.

* * *

_Darkness. Silence. Fear._

_She was in the crawlspace feeling for the vibrations. The ones those were heavy and quick, as if they were searching for something or someone. She held her breathe, feeling the vibrations getting closer and closer and clos…._

Jennifer sat up, her throat sore and realized it was because she had been screaming. A light flashed on and she saw both her father and step mother in the door. Amanda quickly pushed her way through and sat on Jennifer's bed. "Are you ok?"

She nodded, brushing aside the few tears she had just realized were on her face. "I'm ok. I'm sorry it was a nightmare…."

"What was it about?" Jennifer shook her head. Amanda tried again, "Sometimes, it helps to talk it out loud."

With a shuddering voice she retold her story. "I was in bed, asleep, when mom came for me. She had covered my mouth with her hand and then signed for me to be quiet, that there people in the house. She grabbed my hand, led me to the closet, and shoved me into the crawlspace. Before she covered it up, she warned me to not make any noise, to wait until she came to get me. She was gone a long time. I could see shadows when the closet door was opened, feel the vibrations of heavy feet on the floor, they were quick like they were searching for something, they kept going back and forth, back and forth, I thought they would find me. I was so scared." By this point tears were falling freely down her cheeks. "And I waited, like she told me to. But when I saw it was morning, that the sun was up, I knew she wasn't coming back for me, so I crawled out of the closet and, and, and, ….. I found her….. she was just lying there, not seeing, and all the blood….."

Amanda quickly gathered her up and held her close. Looking over her head, she looked at her husband's determined face. If she wasn't sure before, she knew now. He would stop at nothing to find justice for Samantha Wilson.

* * *

**TBC….**


End file.
